Signs Divorce Mediation Isn’t Right for You

Divorce mediation is often an excellent solution to lengthy, expensive negotiations and court appearances. Unfortunately, mediation isn’t the right choice for every divorcing couple. If you’re unable to compromise, or if one party lets their emotions get the best of them, you’re unlikely to reach a solution—even with the help of a trained mediator.

Here are the signs divorce mediation may not be right for you:

• Unable to compromise:Mediation relies on both parties wanting to compromise and resolve issues together, from custody to how to divide assets. If you have a high conflict spouse, or your relationship issues are so painful that you’re unable to set them aside during sessions, you’ll probably need to resolve the issue through lawyers. This is common when infidelity plays a part in the divorce, or a spouse otherwise feels wronged.
• Impaired decision-making:When spouses have conditions that may impair their decision-making, such as severe mental illness or addictions, they may not have the capacity to reach a fair resolution—especially if there are children to protect. In this case, having an advocate for you and any children is often the best way to proceed.
• Hiding assets:Mediation is based on honesty and compromise, with a shared goal of deciding together how to divide assets and care for any children. If you suspect that your spouse is hiding assets, you’ll need a lawyer and financial professionals to uncover the true state of affairs.
• Abusive relationships:Finally, if your relationship is abusive, avoid mediation. (If you’re not sure, check resources like this quiz to determine whether you’re in an abusive marriage.) Abused spouses can benefit from having an advocate on their side, rather than trying to negotiate with a spouse acting in bad faith.

Contact the knowledgeable Long Island divorce meditators at Solutions Divorce Mediation to find out whether mediation could be right for you.