Consider Your Emotional State Before Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation is a great solution to keep your divorce issues out of court. However, it’s also not for everyone.

Before you decide to move forward with mediation, you should consider whether you are in the proper emotional state for it to be truly effective for your case. Specifically consider whether you are capable of suppressing your anger when you are in the same room as your spouse.

Can you really mediate if you hate your spouse?

It is absolutely possible to negotiate in mediation with a spouse you can’t stand. However, it takes commitment (on each of your parts) to truly make it work, and if you are not willing to try, then mediation cannot be a solution for your issues.

It will be unavoidably difficult to negotiate with a spouse that you are very angry with. It is very difficult to separate those emotions, and that is understandable. But mediators are aware of this and are trained to work around those emotions and set you up for success. You can also benefit from seeking professional counseling or therapy outside of your mediation sessions so you can work through your emotions.

For your mediation to work, both sides will need to feel safe and non-threatened. That doesn’t mean there aren’t going to be emotions like anger or bitterness, but so long as both sides are willing to negotiate in good faith, those other emotions can be worked around.

Direct, face-to-face communication is the most effective method of mediation, but there are circumstances in which divorce mediators can schedule breaks to defuse tension or meet privately with one party to discuss or work through a matter that is stalling negotiations.

For more information about how you can go forward with mediation even when emotions are running high, contact an experienced Long Island divorce lawyer at Solutions Divorce Mediation.